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When the evening is spread out against the sky Below are 6 entries, after skipping 10 most recent ones in the "Whit" journal:

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August 17th, 2004
04:02 pm

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and in the end, everyone wonders why they didn't know from the beginning...

Current Mood: fullfull
Current Music: Olympic theme in the background

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July 27th, 2004
02:58 pm

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GREEN = GO!
Vir: "I wish there was a place where we could just go and borrow books anytime we wanted without having to pay for them."
Jason: "Isn't that a library?"

They're both so cute.

And Briana's freakin hilarious.
"At least I didn't stop at a green light!"

Yesterday was a good day.

It's so funny to combine friends from different areas of your life and have the same joke between all of you. I love it.

I get to see Kari and Jamie in two days, woohoo Minnesota!
I'm burning the Carpenters for Kari....and man oh man is it gee. It'll put my mind at ease to see her. It's gonna be wierd though, being without Vir and Samuri Bob and Jason and Napoliwisk for a whole week and a half. 'Sall good in da hood, though, yo.

Woohoo for Pollock Halls, swimming pools, and frat boys!

Current Mood: gigglygiggly
Current Music: The Masquerade - The Carpenders

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July 18th, 2004
07:07 pm

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To be read quickly...
He's my friend He's my friend He's my friend He's my friend He's my incredible friend No He's my friend He is my friend Only my friend But man when he puts on his glasses he's my hot friend and I just want him but he's my friend and he's my friend and he's my friend, my FRIEND. Case closed.

Current Mood: anxiousanxious
Current Music: Hands Down ~ Dashboard Professional

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01:28 am

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Napoliwisk
Confusion.
Anger.
Trust.
Laughter.
Disappointment.
Hurt.
Expectations.
Joy.
I told you so.
Selfishness.
Irrationality.
Objectivity.
Weaknesses.
You're one of them, know that?
Solace.
Tranquility.
Upheaval.
Revolution.
Consuming.
Permeating.
Alone.
Hopeful.
Again, disappointment.
Worried.
Love.
Cynical.
Determination.
Hate.
Different.
Distrust.
Quizzical.
Forever.
In reality, never.
Childlike.
Idealistic.
Then the cynicism kicks back in.
Sarcastic.
Defensive.
Vunerable.
Love.
Paranoid.
Can you see through my skin?
Perhaps into the very places I fear.
That's another one.
Fear.
Apprehension.
Normallcy.
Comfortable.
Silence.
Excitment.
Disappointment.
Love.
So easy how you make me feel about you.
Like a fitted glove.
But not.

You're beautiful just the way you are.

Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: Freshman ~ Virve Pipe....over and over

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June 21st, 2004
04:51 am

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side effects of a headache
So I can't sleep, and while my mind continues to be bombarded with thoughts, I think I'll grab myself a refreshment.
Perhaps an orange soda.
Perhaps.
If peanut butter is my midnight snack, orange soda can definatly be my 4 am refreshment.

I had a dream last week that I slit a girl's throat. The only part I can still remember is after I'd done it, just looking at her and watching the blood slide down her throat, thinking how beautiful, how tranquil in the middle of a choatic moment, it was. Beautiful.

I also had a dream that Angel told me Jason liked me. I guess that's what dreams are for, huh? To give us false hopes.

So Samuri Bob DID call from the Alamo...sounds pretty crazy down there...but it made me laugh in the middle of the mall and totally made my day. I watched Quills the other night, & I thought of you. I think I like it so much because it has that underlying HONESTY about it, just like the Rules does.

And don't think I haven't thought about you, Vob.

Sometimes you can feel so close to people, and other times, it's hard to believe we're on the same planet. It's so bizarre how one person has the ability to change your life in so many powerful and subtle ways, and yet you can function like you'd never met each other. Kinda sad, actually. Lately I've just been feeling so "foreign" from so many people, and a lot of it's my own fault, I know.

I feel like one of those chemistry experiments we learned about back in the day, the kind that once the elements have been combined, you can't change it back to the original solution. And if you don't like the new solution, you have to dump the current one down the drain and start all over again.
What do you do when you don't like who you're becoming?

Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: the metrenome of the coocoo clock

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June 16th, 2004
01:09 am

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In anticipation of sunrise
It annoys me when people ask "So how's your love life?" It's not a real question, it's a filler question. Of course, when good friends ask for the update, it's slightly different - but seriously, it's like everytime I see an acquaintance or talk to relative, the subject comes up. And although it's not like they KNOW I don't have a boyfriend, everytime, it's just like "gee thanks, well actually, I'm not dating now" - just feels like I'm expected to be in a relationship, and because I'm not, it's weird, therefore making me weird, unusual, freakish. Then you get the sympathy nod and "Don't worry, you'll meet someone soon" or "well, there are plenty of boys in State College"...what if that's not one of my priorities? I'm not trying to turn all feminist or whatever here, but please, I've been doing just dandy on my own for the past twenty years & am pretty sure I can make it twenty more, thank you very much. Honestly, I DO want to meet a boy, I DO want to fall in love, I DO want to settle down, I DO want to get married, and at this point I DO want to have kids. I want to argue about the little things because we both will know that they don't matter, it won't matter where we put the TU dishes or who dusts or vacuums. As the Beatles simply stated: "All you need is love." Well, that's pretty rare these days. People, including myself, are too selfish for love to elaborate. So in answer to the question that began this rant, my love life is slightly comatose at the moment. Ask me about my goals instead - they're far more interesting.

Current Mood: annoyedannoyed
Current Music: Alkaline Trio - Bloodied Up

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